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Becoming by Michelle Obama will likely be one of my favorite books of 2019. I will readily confess that I was already a big Michelle Obama fan, but this memoir made me appreciate her strength, resolve, kindness, and intelligence even more.
The first two sections of this memoir are beautifully written. The stories of her childhood, friendships, education, career, early relationship with Barack, and journey into marriage and parenthood pulled me along in the same way that my favorite novels submerses me in the characters and places that are described.
I instantly cared deeply about not just Michelle, but also about her family, friends, and community as well. No one was presented as a saint, but nearly every person was depicted in a grace-filled, multifaceted way that made me feel like I knew, or at least knew people that were like, these people I’ve never met.
Michelle Obama owns her story, doesn’t shy away from her own strengths and giftings, but consistently and gracefully gives others credit where credit is due. Her writing is smart, funny, and reflective. I smiled and cheered her on, but also teared up at her deep losses along the way.
The farther into Becoming that I read, however, the more my reading pace began to slow. This memoir is well-written, compelling, and enjoyable to read, and yet I found myself taking my time to read in a way that is unusual for me. Normally a book of this size, that holds my interest (which this did), would take me just a few days to finish, but I read this book slowly, portioning it out in small doses over several weeks.
I didn’t rush through this book, mostly, I think, because I was savoring it, but partly because the closer her story came to catching up with present day the more emotional the experience felt.
In the final section of the book, her recounting of the presidential campaign and life in the White House, I thoroughly delighted in her stories of meeting world leaders like Queen Elizabeth and Nelson Mandela, and soaked in her descriptions (both positive and negative) of what it was like to actually live in the White House. It was her personal recounting of the large and small stories that flowed through the news cycle of the past decade that brought my personal emotions rushing to the forefront, however. She and I had much different access and vantage points to these events (for starters, zero percent of these news stories were about me or my family), but I still had my own deeply personal emotions and memories attached to each, and they frequently came rushing to the surface in ways that I hadn’t expected when I first began reading this memoir.
I’ve read other reviews that said they felt Michelle became significantly more guarded in the final section of the book, where she writes about her life in the midst of the presidential campaigns and in the White House than in the earlier two sections. I agree with this assessment, but I don’t blame her. I wonder if she received the same advice that I often have, to only write (or speak) from your scars, not from your open wounds. There are certainly places where I think speaking completely candidly from your current wounds IS called for, but a sure-to-be best-selling memoir probably isn’t one of them.
I know I had to give myself a reality check often through the final chapters of Becoming, reminding myself that the events she is describing just happened in the past few years, even though they seem like a lifetime ago. Of course, I have no idea what on-going points of pain from the past few years Michelle Obama might be reckoning with, but I know she’s not the only one whose wounds from the trauma of current events don’t yet feel anything like scars.
Maybe down the road she’ll write another memoir with more details and unguarded opinions and personal reflections about her time in the White House and transitioning to life afterward. I would happily read it. For now, I’m happy to watch for glances of her in the media as she works to make a positive difference in our country and in our world, “going high” while it seems like so many others are continually finding new and horrifyingly inventive ways to “go low.”
Her final few paragraphs of this book are a gem: honest, hopeful, and encouraging–a sermon I didn’t know I desperately needed. I am so thankful for strong women like Michelle Obama, and so grateful for this beautiful book.
playwithyourfaith.com 